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She felt the echo before she heard it. Perhaps she didn’t feel the echo at all. Perhaps she was jarred from hearing the sound for the first time and it deceived her senses. How does one feel an echo after all?

The sky was polluted with what appeared to be giant heavy gray snowflakes, layering every surface they discovered. Burning streams of fire laced the mountainside. She felt these burning streams course through the marrow of her bones before, when he told her he loved her, when their skin touched in all its naked glory, and when he said goodbye.

Bitterness was the anchoring tree trunk she clung to, as she watched others swept away by ensuing storms. She wasn’t sure why she held to anything at all when she could have so easily let go to join the flood of the mangled, the broken; swallowed by the muddy earth.

The aftermath had a stench, with putrid threads that wove the unconnected and uncomfortable into a carpet of crushed bone and branch, land and life, on which to rest a while and thrive again. Her bare feet were pricked with the layers of debris he left behind for her to walk upon. Her lips were scorched by the heat of his nearly-forgotten kiss. Her heart? There was nothing of it left to salvage.

She waited by the side of the road for rescue, weakness proving to be her only strength. She’d survived – so what.



Image courtesy of Microsoft Office ClipArt

36 responses »

  1. geesh….oh how i know how this goes. you have great imagery in this throughout. when (at least for me) i finally read that last line, there are like a multiple words to convey that line – like lack of feeling, apathetic perhaps, who really cared and probably many more. it’s a very very strong piece sheila:))

      • Good exercises I think. It is one thing trying to write a book, but I get the feeling that you are a little like me in that you have other stuff floating around in there, and a little bit of diversion to get it out is needed.

  2. Great use of imagery and setting. I really liked it.

    As a side note, WordPress doesn’t use “#” for its tags. It might be best to remove them and leave the words only.

    • Thanks Joe for the comment and the wordpress tip – I guess I got into a habit of using them on Twitter perhaps? Don’t know 🙂 Hope you’re having a good weekend!

  3. “…their skin touched in all its naked glory…”

    … pulled this out of context, because i enjoy the enticing artistic canvas it represents to an innocent couple (a time in my youth) deciding to ‘go-steady’ – holding hands could easily be considered an eruption of pleasure in all its glory – remembering oh so long ago, when the BeaTles first introduced the song, “I Want To Hold Your Hand” written by John Lennon and Paul McCartney, and recorded in October 1963. Those lyrics were so beautiful and stirring to me at the time.

    as i put the line back into context:

    the echoes (FAIL!) ……….. your brush has vivid explosions of erotic senses – evolving into bitterness – she was left in those flames bitterness stokes giving her strength to endure, and finally survives…… so what! (actually he walked out gaining the short straw IMO)

    thanks for sharing your creativity! and reading my two cents!

  4. Feeling the hollow inside the echo that promises to blow up into a storm of loneliness , nothing but your own emptiness being your companion and the long winding roads with no milestones …..your story creeps into the literary nerves and grips the readers with a phenomenon that wikipedia may call ” sheilamania”….

  5. Wow, I was going to comment on how great your imagery in that was, and then looking down through the comments, I see it’s a comment sentiment. I guess great minds think alike~

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